This is me and my hubby Kevin at Waterton National Park on Victoria Day this year. We love Waterton, and I had a goal this year to do all the easy hikes in the Park. So on this day in the rain, we did two small walks. The boat dock loop and the town loop, (not including the camp ground). We actually just went around the town block twice. I know a bit pathetic, but for me with my knees it was an accomplishment. Doc says I must get more exercise, get the blood flowing, muscles moving, and lymphathic system working better. And exercise does all this. Exercise is one of the best inner body cleansers.
I'm into my second week of Chemo/radiation and so far everything is going well. Not many side effects at all to speak of. The little pouch I have that carries my chemo is attached to a belt around my waist and it infuses into my power port at a rate of 1.5 cc's per hour. Go to Lethbridge everyday for radiation and I want to thank all the wonderful ladies who are taking me in. I really enjoy the visits. The nurses are awesome and I love talking with all of them. They are always checking up on me. I even ran into an old high school friend, and it is so good to see her. She is still the funny happy girl I knew back then.
Well I would love to blog all day but I have some healthier things I need to do. Like even cleaning my house is a healthier thing to do.

Martina Navratilova: Plant-Based Diet is The Best. Very wise Words of Wisdom.

HIVES!! Really???

I love this picture my daughter took of the "Fish Pond" right here in our town. It also makes me feel peaceful. Well it's been quite a week, the highlight being our youngest daughters graduation from High School. It was such a nice graduation, "koodos" to all who helped pull it off. I'm so glad that I was able to be there not under the influence of chemo/radiation. All the grads looked so good, and all the girls looked amazing in their dresses. The convocation was just the right length and Kevin and I were home before 10:30 p.m., which is when I was tired out.
Got my port-a-cath inserted or "power port" as they called it. Thought they were going to plug my into something electrical. Yes, the flu bug passed, and all went well. Just some local freezing, lots of sterile procedures, (I was buried under drapes), and lots of pressure, tugging, and pulling, but no real pain. By the time the graduation was ready to start I was ready to go, just a little bit tender.
After the grad, Kevin and I came home and watched a movie on Netflix, I fell asleep quite quickly into the movie, and woke up just as it was finishing. This is where it gets exciting, "but what to my wondering eyes should appear?"  HIVES, yes hives, all around my knees and arms. That's actually what woke me up, I was scratching. What now. I was able to go back to sleep and everything appeared to be much better yesterday morning. Then late yesterday afternoon, I could feel my temperature going back up so I quickly drank some really cold water, which strangely seemed to take care of it, but the hives started coming back, and so I went a bought some Benadryl. This morning when I woke up, everything but my face was covered in HIVES. What is going on? Kevin and I have been trying to figure out what I have reacted to, and I haven't been exposed to anything new except the Port-a-cath, and the doctor in emergency this morning was pretty confident that it wasn't that, especially since there is no redness or swelling or hives around the site itself. Some freaky one time exposure to something has set this off. So here I sit at the computer, (no church for me today) looking rather blotchy everywhere. Trying not to get discouraged, and trying to keep my sense of humor. Kevin said this morning, maybe Heavenly Father is letting you feel all the side effects now. Not funny! Anyways I hope this long weekend finds you all well. Enjoy your Monday, I am still planning on going to Waterton, here's hoping.

You know you've gotten your greens when

This morning I got up and after Kevin and Jaime had left I prepared myself a grapefruit and a wholewheat piece of toast with just a scant amount of peanut butter. The grapefruit was delicious and the toast was great, UNTIL I was going to bite into the last corner when I realized the side of the crust was MOLDY, ooooohhhhhhh!!!!!
I'm not going to get sick am I? NO, after all if it's green it has to be good for you, right? I can't believe I missed that.
Just a brief update. I've gotten some kind of bug this week, just feel weak and achy all over and keep getting these low grade fevers. Was supposed to get my port-a-cath put in yesterday but it has been put off until tomorrow morning. They told me that I should be good to go to Jamie's grad, just ice my chest and take tylenol. Hope they're right cause I'm going regardless.
Kevin and I are hoping to get to Waterton sometime this weekend to have sometime together before treatments begin next week. I hope you all have a wonderful May long weekend, and go outside, and be with family and friends.

"I am a Child of God, and He has sent me here.

Has given me an earthly home with parents kind and dear.

I am a Child of God, and so my needs are great.

Help me to understand his words before it grows to late

I am a Child of God, rich blessings are in store,

If I but learn to do he will, I'll live with him once more.

Lead me, Guide me, Walk beside me,

Help me find the way.

Teach me all that I must do, to live with him some day."

This picture was on our bulletin this past Sunday. When I saw it, I began to cry and I started thinking about the Primary song above. This was the first song I learned, long before I was baptized. And it has come to mean so much more to me, especially during these times of trouble and adversity. This song is about a child singing to they're parent about their need to learn about their Heavenly Father, so that they can reap all the blessings he has in store for those who follow him and do his will. As an adult now for me it's meaning becomes slightly different. I now plead directly to my Savior:
"I am a Child of God, and you have sent me here.
Have given me an earthly home with parents kind and dear.
I am a Child of God, and so my needs are great.
Help me to understand your words before it grows to late.
I am a Child of God, rich blessings are in store,
If I but learn to do your will, I'll live with you once more.
Lead me, Guide me, Walk beside me,
Help me find the way
Teach me all that I must do, to live with you someday."
That's why we're here, to learn his will, accept his will. To let him lead me, to let him guide me and to let him walk beside me. Ah "there in lies the rub", as I think Shakespeare said.
It's one thing to say it, it's another thing to do. As mortals we have our agency, and we have the earth and all it's splendor, and all the temptations that go along with it. As Satan tries and tempts us, and as he whispers in our ears we find it ever so hard at times to submit to the Lord's will and what he wants for us. There are words in another song that come to mind. One line in "Come, Come Ye Saints".
"Why should we think to earn a great reward, if we now SHUN THE FIGHT". When we choose to not accept a calling, when we choose to not do our Visiting Teaching, when we choose to not do those things on a daily basis that bring us closer to him. Are we not in a sense, SHUNNING THE FIGHT? We are after all at war. As mortals we face adversity in basically 3 ways:
1. We are mortal and are subject to disease and frailty
2. Everyone else is mortal and imperfect and we suffer sometimes because of what they can do to us.
3. Because we have our agency we often make choices contrary to His will. And we suffer.

As I now battle this disease, I realize that I have no where to turn, but to Him. He is my "buckler and shield". I now that this is His will for me right now, and I feel confident that everything will be okay. What I need to make sure of is that I learn what he wants me to learn, and submit cheerfully. I am thinking of Mosiah 24 : 13 -15:
"And it came to pass that the
voice of the Lord came to them in
their afflictions, saying: Lift up
your heads and be of good comfort,
for I know of the covenant which
ye have made unto me; and I will
covenant with my people and deliver
them out of bondage.
And I will also ease the burdens
which are put upon your
shoulders, that even you cannot feel
them upon your backs, even while
you are in bondage; and this will I
do that ye may stand as witnesses
for me hereafter, and that ye may
know of a surety that I, the Lord
God, do visit my people in their
afflictions.
And now it came to pass that
the burdens which were laid upon
Alma and his brethren were made
light; yea, the Lord did strengthen
them that they could bear up their
burdens with ease, and they did
submit cheerfully and with patience
to all the will of the Lord."

Just some of my thought this day, sorry for the sermon.
Tomorrow I get my port-a-cath inserted, and yes I will get something to help me relax. Yeah!!! Oh, and many thanks to all of you ladies who have called wanting to help get me to my treatments. I can't tell you how grateful I am.

What would I do without Daisys

Don't you just love Daisies? I do. They are to me the happiest flower. When I look at this picture it helps me to feel peaceful and calm and that things are still beautiful in my world.
Cancer Clinic - Day Three; was long. Even though I was only there for the morning, I was there the whole morning. Started the day at Medical Imaging get my litre and a half of what looks like water. Had to drink that over the next hour and a half, and while I was doing that I had to go meet my Radiation Oncologist- Dr. Wilson. She was very nice and also very thorough. She went through everything again with me, every test result and the surgery and prognosis. My blood tests from Wednesday all came back normal. She was particularly glad that my cancer markers were with in normal range and that my liver enzymes were normal. She said that that is encouraging, but that we still need the results from the CT Scan to be sure that there has been no spread. I find that every pain I feel in my body I wonder if its the Cancer. I have to keep telling myself not to go there. For the most part it's easy to distract myself, but it's hard at 4:00 am when I can't sleep and everyone else is asleep.
After I met with the Doctor I had to run back over to Medical Imaging to have my CT Scan, no time to stop and pea after drinking all that water (or whatever it was). Something that helps me glow when they do the test. When I got in to the scan room I had to swallow these citric crystals with water, (not pleasant) then lay down on the table and have them start an IV with contrast media. During the scan they infuse this stuff that goes really fast through your body, and it makes you feel warm, and also makes you feel like your peeing your pants, but your not. Weird. I'm sure a lot of you have had this test before. After I got that done, I peed. Then ran back over to the Cancer Clinic where I went the elevator to the Radiation complex. Everyone there was so awesome. I had my radiation teaching, and then I got another CT Scan so they could mark where they are going to zap me. I got to lay on my stomach on a special table, and almost fell asleep. They then did some markings on my behind and guess what - I am officially tattooed. Three little dots. One on each hip and one on my tail bone. They'll use these marks every time I go for radiation to line me up for my zapping.
The lady who did my Radiation Teaching gave me a smoothie recipe; I'm going to try it when I have a slightly bigger blender. Here is the recipe:

1 banana- fresh or frozen
1 apple- cored
1 Carrot- peeled
1 Cup water
other frozen fruit of choice- 1 serving
Ground flax seed 1-2 tbsp, and any other spices you want to add
Hemp Hearts or other. What ever one likes to add
2 handfuls of spinach

Blend into smoothie. There you have 5-6 servings of fruits and veggies all for breakfast.
She uses her vita-mix blender. Maybe need to get me one of those.
This lady, ( I wish I could remember her name) was so nice. And the radiation facility is really nice too. They explain every thing they are doing to you, and are always reassuring and comforting. They don't baby you, but they are so up beat and respectful.
One thing I am beginning to notice is that everyone I have seen that works at the Cancer Clinic is slim and healthy. Not P-90 X bodies, but just healthy. They all look like they are doing those things that will make a difference in their future health.
Dr. Wilson very kindly told me that because I am as large as I am I am exposing myself to serious health problems in my not to distant future, and not just the cancer coming back. My risk of cancer recurrence is so much higher at my size than if I was within a normal weight range. What greater motivation can I have than that. I can increase my own odds of survival by adopting a healthy life style now and carrying it on into my future. She also encourages whole foods, and eating as close to nature as possible. And that regular exercise will help with the feelings of fatigue that I may get during my therapy. My chemo doctor wants me to get 3 hours per week of at least walking and to eat 6-8 small meals per day. No more hot dogs for me, well maybe just a couple a year.

Cancer Clinic- Day two

I love the Cardston Temple. It is my home temple, but it is also my favorite. This morning I was getting ready to study my scriptures, and to be honest the last little while my scripture study has been less than stellar. I was finding myself having a hard time concentrating and not really knowing what I should be looking for. When I said my prayers I ask Heavenly Father for direction in my care, and wanting some assurances that I was doing the right thing by having all these toxins go through my body. (More on that later) So then I needed to know where I should start studying. You see we're in Mormon for Family study, I'm in Mosiah for Sunday School study, and in Alma for personal. I'm everywhere. And I'm rather a methodical person and need a starting point for this particular topic of study, which is by the way, Healing and what I can do specifically. So after praying about that I remembered that earlier this year I had found a scripture reading chart on the internet called "Scripture University 2008 schedule, read the entire standard works once". Everything is broken down into days, so I went to May 9th, and opened my scriptures to 1 Chronicles 17. I got as far as the second verse and my answer was given to me as to the direction of my care. "Then Nathan said unto David, Do all that is in thine heart; for God is with thee." David was asking Nathan to inquire of the Lord regarding a certain question, and this is what the Lord said. This is an answer to prayer for me, because I have so many things that are in my heart that I think are right for my care, chemo/radiation being one of them. Also eating whole foods as close to nature as possible and getting exercise. I felt like in this scripture the spirit was telling me that Heavenly Father will support me because he knows whats in my heart is right.
So today at the Cancer Clinic I got taught all about chemo and what it does. Myths and Truths. I learned all about the side effects, and what to do. I met more wonderful people, especially one man who I actually know from when we lived on the West side in Lethbridge, he and his family were in our ward, and I knew his wife quite well. He is one of the pharmacists at the Cancer Clinic and he came in and talked to me all about the drugs and what to expect. He was so nice and very up beat. He also told me that despite the unfortunate name that my chemo doctor has, he is one of the best. He comes down from Edmonton every Monday from the Cross Cancer Institute and is very respected not just there but all over the province. He also told me about my radiation doctor who is also very good, and very thorough. That made me feel much better. Everyone wants to know that they are in good hands, and not in the hands of sub par people.
One of the kits I received today was my bio hazard cleaning kit. This is given to me just in case my bottle that I'm hooked up to at home happens to break or the tubing happens to rip. In this kit is a gown, gloves, goggles, and special cleaning cloths or cleaner or something to help me handle the chemo drugs should they get loose, so to say. I told the nurse that so many precautions had to be taken to protect myself if it spills, yet this stuff is going into my veins? HHHMMMMMMM!!!!!!! Doesn't that make you kind of want to run? You'd think that with all the money they put to Cancer research every year, for all these years they could maybe come up with something better. Now you extremists out there that are saying, "well there already is a cure, the pharmaceutical companies are covering it up, and their all part of a big conspiracy", keep your shirt on. And don't post back to me that I should run or something like that. I know for me that this is the right thing to do, and you know what they watch you so closely, I mean I'm pretty much going to be living at the hospital for the next 6 months, everyone already knows me by name and are so willing to help with whatever I'm concerned about. And you know what they are the first ones to say that this is not what we wish to give, but it works for most people in my particular stage of cancer it works and will give me many more years. The thing is NO ONE can predict with any certainty what Cancer is going to do. Sometimes it goes away, sometimes it goes dormant, and sometimes it comes back. Many positive strides have been made in the fight against cancer especially in the benefits of living a healthy lifestyle, and eating close to nature. And they tell you to do that, the pamphlets tell you to do that. Okay I'm ranting, I need to finish.
I'm back to the Cancer clinic tomorrow to get a CT Scan and see my Radiation Oncologist. Another half day at my new second home.
Oh, and many thanks to my wonderful Sister-in-law who brought me a chopper blender. Green Smoothie's here I come.

Food Matters Official Trailer

Love this

May 7th, 2012; today I met my Oncologist for the first time. I wouldn't usually say what his name is but, it's too funny for someone like me who has Colrectal Cancer. His name is.................Dr. Butts............... yes, you read it right. Now when you've stopped laughing I'll get on with my day. hahahahahahahahahahahaha
The Lethbridge Cancer Center is beautiful and very welcoming. The staff is very nice. I can't remember my nurses name, but she was amazing. Dr. Butts was wonderful and explained everything very well. He gave me two treatment options, one more aggressive than the other. I have chosen the more aggressive one, just because I don't want this to come back. I've already had the first line of treatment which is surgery, so this chemo/radiation is to get rid of any microscopic particles that could be floating around, which is very likely as 4 of the 20 Lymphnodes tested came back positive for cancer. Right now I'm considered at a level called Stage C or 3. There are 4 stages the 4th stage meaning other organs have become involved. I do still have to have a CT scan of my lungs, abdomen, and pelvis, but chemo and radiation will begin regardless of what those show. This Wednesday I go back for Chemo teaching and a tour and blood work. On Thursday I go back to meet with the Radiation doctor. Radiation comes first with one chemo drug. I get that everyday  for 5 weeks. Oh by the way I have to have a port-a-cath inserted into my chest so the Chemo can be infused into one of my much larger veins. This catheter will be in my chest for the duration of my treatment, which will be 6 months. After the 5 weeks of daily radiation I will begin the second chemo drug along with continuing the 1st chemo drug. I go every two weeks for 3 days, Mon,Tues and Wed., to get hooked up. It takes 46 hours for the drugs to infuse then I go back and get unhooked. This stage of treatment will last 4 months. 6 months in total. Should be done everything by end of October 2012.
Side effects- with these particular chemo drugs I shouldn't lose my hair, so they said. It may thin perhaps, but I shouldn't lose it. My main concerns is low white count and platelet counts as well as mouth sores and sensitive hands and feet especially to cold. Loss of appetite, and nausea and vomiting. They told me that everyone's experience is individual, from some hardly experiencing any side effects to the few who experience all and to the great extreme. I was told that once they know how my metabolism works they will be able to adjust the Chemo accordingly.
I was concerned about all of this starting before my daughter's grade 12 graduation, but with all the prep stuff I'm pretty much safe until after the Canadian long weekend- Victoria Day. Which is just after. The Doctor and I talked about supportive therapies such as suppliments and other things. Most of which he had no objection to. BUT he made a very good point, one which I already know and have been learning about. He said "all the homeopathic remedies in the world aren't going to cure you, if you are not taking every opportunity to be as healthy as you can be. There is no substitute for nutritional excellence and exercise. Not even vigorous exercise, but consistent moderate exercise on a daily basis is proving extremely effective is preventing cancer's return.
I read a pamphlet on Colrectal cancer from the cancer center, and it talked a lot about nutrition, especially avoiding lots of meat, and even encouraged more legumes and beans instead of meat. Also encouraging whole grains and eating more foods in their raw form. This goes along with everything I have been reading and studying about. And what a boost for the Word of Wisdom. The Lord in his wisdom knew what we needed even all the way back then. We must remove our beastly appetites and become more moderate, eating with prudence and thanksgiving all that we consume.
So begins my journey. I'll be posting more often now that the ball is rolling. Hopefully this coming Christmas I will be able to post the best post of all, no more Cancer.